The things I carry is very hard for me to talk about at times, but I must never forget where I come from and the journey I will always be on for the rest of my life. I carry the shame of being an x-drug addict for eleven years, I also carry the pain that I have caused my family during those years. All the time that I have lost away from my family and friends wasted away on chasing after my drugs. I also lost a lot of time not getting to know my nieces and them not getting to know me, so whenever I come around they shy away from me and I carry that burden around with me everyday until they do get to know that I am there aunt.
The best things I carry is the eighteen months of sobriety that I have today and another chance at life, I am just starting to get my confidence back in myself which was lost a long time ago. I also carry with me the various chips for certain lengths of sobriety that I have earned in the past eighteen months along with a court card that I need to get signed every time that I go to an AA or NA meeting. I am very proud of myself and know that I will always be in recovery for the rest of my life, but I also carry around that demon knowing that it can come back to ruin my great life that in a blink of an eye...
It is great to know that you are sober today.But most of all that you care about yourself and that you decided to continue with your education because that is positive. It is awesome that you are making amends to people that you care about. Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteYour story has made me think about my family. I made me remember all the pain we went through when we had various of our family members in drugs. I am glad you are making that difference in your life. It is never too late to make that difference. You have so many years ahead of you, that you do not need to think about the past. Good Luck and I know you can fight this out.
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