Refelction 2

What is going well for me this semester is that I am finding out that I can actually do the "going back to school" thing sticking through it and not giving up like I used to do with everything in my past. I have learned that no matter what my past was like or where I was, I can bounce back and actually do the things that I thought I couldn't do because my brain was too fried from all the drug abuse over the years. I know now that I still have a chance of living a good life that I want to live if I just buckle down and the right thing one day at a time. Or in the words of my mother "just do it already". If it wasn't for my mom I don't think that I would be in school at all, she has been my number one supporter in anything that I have tried to do ever since I started to get sober. The one thing I would like to improve on is my relationship with my father. We didn't get along too well when I was younger and I was not the best child I could have been due to the poor choices on my behalf at such a young age, but I know that he loves me no matter what I do or how many times I may mess up in life and he is proud of me and how far I have come in a little over eighteen months. He is also a big supporter for me now and I would like to work on making up for all the pain and hurtful things I did to him when I was in my addiction. What I have learned about myself mostly is that if I can come from living on the streets like a gypsy just trying to survive each and every day, to a working, sober, happy, college student in such a short time than I can do anything I set my mind to...... Including learning about schema from my reading class and getting a perfect score on my vocabulary test, cause without that and the study group we had that very few of us went to, I would have never have gotten that perfect score...

Insomnia (Noun)




Inability to sleep soundly




Source sentence: Suffering a bout of insomnia, however, I was stalking sleep, not defenseless wayfarers




The Context Clue logic tells me that he is suffering, stalking sleep and defenseless




Original Sentence: My co worker suffers from insomnia and has to take medication for her to sleep well at night





Eviscerated (Verb)





To gut, insides cut out





Source Sentence: After slaughter the hogs were decapitated, split down the length of the belly,pried open ,eviscerated, and strung up by the hind hocks on a high conveyer belt.





Context clue: The context clue logic, tells me through an act of violence





Original sentence: I would be disgusted to see anything be eviscerated


Dismay (Noun)



Disappointed feeling; distress



Source Sentence: As a softy who is scarcely able to take a knife to a raw chicken-let alone hold it to a persons throat-I was surprised, embarrassed, and dismayed all at once



Context Clue: Logic tells me that through embarrassment, and surprise how he is feeling dismayed



Original Sentence: I was in total dismay over the grammie's when Taylor Swift took home the award for artist of the year.


Solace (Noun)



Comfort, Peace



Source Sentence: Yet these truths are no solace against the kind of alienation that comes of being ever the suspect, against being set apart, a fearsome entity with whom pedestrians avoid making eye contact.



Context Clue: Example tells me that feeling alienated, a suspect, being set apart, and avoiding eye contact that he recieves no solace.


Original Sentence: Before I go to bed at night I feel a great deal of solace after I am done praying.



Perilous (Adjetive)



Dangerous



Source Sentence: The fearsomeness mistakenly attributed to me in public places often has a perilous flavor.



Context Clue: The context clue logic tells me that through mistaken fearsomness in a public place there always seems to be danger.



Original Senntence: I was in a perious state of mind a little over eighteen months ago due to drug abuse.



Taut (Adjetive)



Ridged, Tight



Source Sentence: Elsewhere-visiting friends from SoHo, where sidewalks are narrow and tightly spaced buildings shut out the sky-things can get very taut indeed.



Context Clue: The contect clue synonym tells me that through narrow sidewalks and tightly spaced buildings that things are very taut.



Original sentence: Now that I have started school my schedule is very taut but, I am learning how to budget my time due to the weekly calander that Miss Henderson has provided for me.

Reflection

I hear stories alomst every single day when I go to meetings of alcoholic anonymous, and believe me there are stories that grab your heart and rip it out of your chest. The one story that made such an impact on me and my life was the one of my sponser, only because she was telling the same story that I had when I was running and gunning on the streets. It had such an impact on my life because here was this lady who I have never met in my life telling me how it used to be for her when she was on drugs and it was as if she was watching my life the whole time step by step. It was amazing to know that there are people out there that have been through alot of troubling times but this women went through the exact same thing I went through word for word. After she was done telling me and other people that were at the meeting her story, and that she had been sober for so long it gave me so much hope that when I asked her to be my sponser it brought tears to my eyes to know that someone that had gone through the exact same experience that I went through can come out of it and overcome what seems to be the worst thing to overcome and live a normal happy life. I am amazed that she also wants to take time out of her own day to help another person out that she has never met before. She has helped me so much over the past eighteen months and I am so grateful that she came into my life when she did, I am proud to call her my best friend.

Vocabulary # 1

Flailing (Noun) http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/flailing

Flailing: Threshing

Source Sentence: An infant discovers that random flailings send the baby bottle flying out of the crib and crashing to the floor

Original Sentence: The sails of the boat were flailing in the wind.

My demons

The things I carry is very hard for me to talk about at times, but I must never forget where I come from and the journey I will always be on for the rest of my life. I carry the shame of being an x-drug addict for eleven years, I also carry the pain that I have caused my family during those years. All the time that I have lost away from my family and friends wasted away on chasing after my drugs. I also lost a lot of time not getting to know my nieces and them not getting to know me, so whenever I come around they shy away from me and I carry that burden around with me everyday until they do get to know that I am there aunt.
The best things I carry is the eighteen months of sobriety that I have today and another chance at life, I am just starting to get my confidence back in myself which was lost a long time ago. I also carry with me the various chips for certain lengths of sobriety that I have earned in the past eighteen months along with a court card that I need to get signed every time that I go to an AA or NA meeting. I am very proud of myself and know that I will always be in recovery for the rest of my life, but I also carry around that demon knowing that it can come back to ruin my great life that in a blink of an eye...